Mass Effects
by Airhime
Summary: An extension from my surprising liked "Priority Palaven" using the planned items from the Diary of Airliza Shepard. These wont be in chronological order, but I will give you the game, or time period, they take place in/around. - Femshep Earth Born/Sole Survivor, Kadian and Garrus Romances. - HIATUS
1. Priority Palaven

Time Period: Priority Palaven Mission, Mass Effect 3

Current Love Interest: Garrus.

Point of View: Garrus.

"_Vakarian, sir. We need you to come back to base, there is, uh, situation."_

My mandibles clicked at that, the hesitation was not a good sign, something had happened, something they didn't want to tell me over comm…. Wait? The tower is working again?

"Roger that. You got the comm tower up and running again?"

"_I can explain when you get here, sir."_

Was it worth pulling rank to find out the answer? ... Think, Garrus, what would _she_ do?

"Fair enough. Garrus out."

Time to move, the main base isn't really that far away, but the sooner I get there, the better.

_(The Turian hitches his rifle to the back of his armour, pulling out the assault rifle as he went. Guided by his trademark visor he made his way across the uneven terrain of Menae, a priority message crossing his visor as he moved. He had entered the base within five minutes.)_

"What have you got?"

I had to stop, an odd feeling ran through me, one I've felt before, when I saw _her_ across that bridge in Omega, it didn't have the same impact now as it did then, I knew _she_ was dead before, I had just assumed…

"As your partner said, succession is normally simple, only now the Hierarchy is in chaos. So many dead or MIA…"

That's why there had been that message…

"I _need_ someone. I don't care who! As long as they can give us the Turian resources we need!"

Nice going, Corinthas, you pissed _her_ off… better step in before we lose more in the command structure.

"I'm on it, Shepard. We'll find you the Primarch."

Shepard watched me carefully as I made my way up into the bunker, that smile crossing her face as realisation came.

"Garrus!"

"Vakarian, sir… didn't see you arrive..."

Heh, in other words, thank you for getting the aggressive human to think about something else.

"At ease, General."

"It's –."

There it is, the smiles gone, back to that carefully constructed commander face. All that happiness I saw in her eyes swirling away as they became as blue as a deep ocean, hiding whatever she had beneath. I guess she was right to do it – we're in the middle of Turian territory, under attack, no time for sentiment, really.

"It's good to see you. I thought you'd be on Palaven."

She was worried… good sign…

"If we lose this moon, we lose Palaven. I'm the closest damn thing we have to an expert on Reapers, so, I'm… 'Advising'.

_Ahem…_

Ah, another human, he seems young…

"Oh, James, this is Garrus Vakarian, he helped me stop the Collectors and take down Saren, he's… a hell of a Soldier."

_Lieutenant James Vega; was assigned to guard me while I was under watch by the Alliance. _Still good at hacking undetected there I see, Shepard.

"Lieutenant… It's good to see you too Liara."

She gave me a quick smile, I had to let her know that I had noticed she was there… maybe just… it's hard to take my eyes away from Shepard.

"It's good to see you in one piece Garrus."

It's time for business, I guess…

"I know who we are after, General Aiden Victus."

"Victus… his name has crossed my desk a few times."

Shepard gave Liara a nod, anyone whose name had been passed to the Shadow Broker was either very talented, or in a whole load of shit… sometimes both.

"Know him, Garrus?"

"I was fighting alongside him this morning… Lifelong military; gets results, popular with his troops, not so popular with command. Has a reputation with playing lose with the rules."

Lines crossed Shepard's face, she was thinking…

"What do you mean by, plays lose?"

That's your on the clock way of saying, is he a crazy bastard or actually capable…

"On Tatrus, during the uprisings, his squad and Turian separatists both found Salarian spies at the same time, he gave up ground, even a stronghold to the separatists."

Damn it Liara, do you have to know, _everything?_

"He waited while the Salarians and separatists fought and wore each other out before he moved in, didn't lose a man."

"Bold strategy, but wild behaviour doesn't get you further up the Hierarchy."

Ah, so that's what you think I'm trying to do is it, Corthinus? Good guess, but wrong… I'd rather be with Shepard.

"Primach Victus… that _will_ be something to see."

Her face un-creased, she was happy with those answers…

"Think he can get the job done?"

"We both know conventional strategy won't work against the Reapers. Right now he could be our best shot."

But that's not what you want to know;

"And I trust him."

"Ok, let's get him on the shuttle and get out of here."

Shepard's hand flew up to her ear, something's never change…

"_Sigh… _Can it wait, Joker? We're in the middle of a warzone."

She glances up at me, and gives me a "just a sec" face, I've become a hell of a lot better at reading her since we first met.

"_Huff, _I need the Normandy standing by, we may need to bug out."

"Should I go back and take a look?"

"Do it, Liara."

Liara ran, Spirits know where she went, or if she even knows where she I going. Turning back to Shepard, I finally notice, her blonde hair is out and it's… long.

"-rrus, you were with Victus this morning?"

Oh!

"Yeah, but we got separated. He went to bolster a flank that was breaking, could be anywhere by now."

"We're trying to raze him, Commander."

"In coming Harvester, heading for the airfield!"

Gunshots rang out, Shepard reaching for her pistol as fast as ever, being under arrest seemed to not have damped her reflexes, or her body… that damn soft, curvaceous Human body, with that arse that filled in her armour just right and… shit, head back in the game Vakarian.

"General, tell Primach Victus we will rendezvous here, meanwhile we'll go take care of whatever that thing dropped off…"

She turned and smiled at me;

"Comin' Garrus?"

"Are you kidding? I'm right behind you!"

We headed of at a sprint to the airfield, a loud panting filling the newly set up comm.

"Heh, James, that you breathing so hard?"

"Yeah, atmosphere is a little thinner than I'm used to is all… Adrenaline is better than Oxygen anyway."

Shepard and I took cover next to each other while James headed down a little further, it was easy to tell he didn't have the attention span to be a sniper… and then it happened, that instant moment where Shepard and I start playing our little game. Each of us trying to one up each other with trick shots… she gave a chuckle as she heard an exasperated sigh from James after she picked off the Husk he had been preparing for.

"Just me, or do those Reapers look like Turians?"

"You're right, they do…"

Spirits… now I know why Shepard has such trouble with the Husks, it's hard to shoot someone whom you might have been fighting alongside with an hour ago.

"_Commander, I've been unable to raze Victus, but we have trouble at the main barricade! If they breach the wall this moon is as good as lost."_

"We're on it, General."

She didn't even flinch as a soldier fell from the mounted turret; she simply skipped over him before climbing the ladder;

"I'll take the turret, you two bolster the line."

It was good fighting with her again, my eyes fell a little too far south once or twice while we made our way to the barricade, before I noticed James was watching that area too… and my mandibles gave an involuntary click… I can't help if I'm a jealous type when it comes to Humans watching her, if there is one thing I know about Shepard, is that she's an extremely attractive, and desirable Human, especially to her own kind. It got ten times worse when, whilst on the turret, her armour started to make her jiggle, her breasts following suit, and a growl made its way out of my mouth, the same one I'd make a year ago when we were taking down the Collectors and she'd tease me around the Battery, she gave a satisfied smirk while red flushed James' face.

"What the hell is that?"

Out of the burning crater came a huge figure; about the size of a Krogan, but it had a long bendable neck, with what looked like half of a Turian face. Before any of us could shoot it, it charged at the barricade, knocking Shepard from the turret, cloaking as she fell, dust flying up as she landed, before reappearing again from behind a rock she was using as cover.

"Vega, draw its attention while I get down there."

"What? Wait!"

No time to argue, boy… unless you want a crushed Commander… which would be the least of your worries once I was done with you. I quickly climbed down; thankfully he had taken the hint and started shooting and yelling at the brute. Before Shepard took its attention again, allowing James down as well.

"Its charges hurt… don't get hit."

With one shot from both myself and Shepard, it fell;

"Kill shot!"

We both glanced at each other, and I smiled at her. The supporting troops where quickly disposed of.

"_Shepard, Cornthus here."_

"What's the word on the Primach?"

"_Still can't get a stable comm link."_

"Alright, I'm going on foot. Shepard out. Garrus, can you take me to where you last saw Victus?"

"No problem, Shepard."

She started to walk behind me, damn it, why do I have to lead…

"You go ahead a bit too, Vega, you can both look at my arse some more later."

I felt my face go hot and I turned to look sheepishly at her, James was doing the same.

"Was hopping you didn't notice, Lola."

Lola? Her names not Lola, its Airliza.

"You are about as stealthy as Joker trying to get down to the bathroom to 'clean up.' You too, Garrus."

I had to laugh at that. Neither of us had been very subtle.

"So, how far Garrus?"

"Should be pretty quick unless we run into trouble."

"So, it's going to take hours then?"

"Yup."

We made our way down the track, and I had to stop for a moment, Palavan caught my eye…

"Look at that…"

"Damn it! Look at Palavan! You see that blaze of orange, the big one, that's where I was born."

"That's rough? Got any family down there?"

"My father, and sister too."

"How bad is it?"

Are you just trying to be talkative, James, or are you actually interested?

"Three Million lost on the first day. Five the second."

Shepard gave a sigh;

"How is your military holding up?"

"Take a look around; that should give you some idea."

"You're putting up a good fight."

"For now, but how long does it take before the fight is kicked out of you?"

"Hey! No talking like that, Vakarian."

"Sorry, Shepard, it's just hard to see this."

"I know…"

"If they'd only listened to your warnings about the Reapers, we might have been ready."

We continued to talk as we made our way around the moon, James is an alright kid, I could get to like him, but I need to ask about this Lola business. Gunshots got slowly louder as we moved closer to Victus;

"Uh, that sounds bad."

"Alright! Double time it! No Reaper is taking _this_ Primach away from me!"

The camp was completely infested, and I could hear Victus yelling commands across the field.

"They're putting up a hell of a fight!"

"And now it's turning…"

Shepard took the last shot, the Turian Reaper falling before Victus.

"General Victus."

"…Yes?"

"I am Commander Shepard of the Normandy."

"Ah, Commander, I know who you are, can't wait to see what brings you out here. Vakarian, where'd you go?"

Memory like a sieve should have maybe mentioned that.

"Heavy Reaper unit on the right flank, I believe you exact words were 'get that thing the hell off my men.'"

"Appreciate it."

Shepard took a few steps forward, she was completely, and utterly in her 'get it done' mode, I kinda feel for Victus, he's either coming with us willingly, or with a bullet in his leg.

"General, you are needed off planet, I have come to get you."

"It will take something beyond importance for me to leave my men, or my Turian brothers and sisters in their fight."

Damn he's being cold towards her, I know he fought in the war, but damn, she's a fucking hero.

"Fedorian was killed, you're the new Primach."

"You're needed immediately to chair a summit, to represent your people in the fight against the Reapers."

That's a long pause, ugh, this isn't going well, please don't shoot him Shepard…

"…I'm Primach of Palavan? Negotiating for the Turian Hierarchy?"

"_Yes._"

"I've spent my whole life fighting, I'm no diplomat, I hate diplomats..."

Shepard smiled;

"War is your resume, at a time like this we need leaders who have been through that hell."

"Huh, I like that… You're right."

"And honestly, uniting these races might take just as much strength as taking down the Reapers."

Her nose scrunched up, it was so cute when she did that.

"See this devastation Primach? Double it for Earth. I _need_ an Alliance. I _need_ the Turian Fleet."

Seeing Earth get hit must have hurt her more than she's letting on… she's slipping from her Commander mask…

"Give me a moment to say goodbye to my men."

"Without him down here, there is a good chance we lose this moon."

She turned on me, her nose still scrunched;

"And without him up there we lose _everything!"_

"…I know."

She instantly relaxed;

"Sorry, bit stressed out."

A flash made me turn, a Reaper stood out in the not so far distance;

"Look at that, and they what my advice on how to stop it? Failed C-Sec officer, vigilante… _scoff _and I'm their expert adviser? ... Think we can win this thing Shepard?"

"Yeah, Garrus… I don't know, but I'm gonna try."

"Well, I'm damn sure nobody else can do it… and, for whatever its worth, I'm with you…"

"Well then, get your things Vakarian and get ready to head to the Normandy."

It felt good to be home, yeah, I consider the Normandy to be home now, feels like I've spent more time here than there. The Battery doors slid open, but I didn't look up.

"Hmm, you don't waste any time getting to work, do you?"

I turned to face Shepard, and my breath hitched, she was in a dress, a rather tight and revealing dress, her longer hair sitting comfortably on her shoulders, while the dress stopped a few inches above her knee, oh Spirits… think about something else, Wrex naked…urgh…

"After what I've been through, calibrating a giant gun is a holiday."

She was being herself here, her eyes a softer blue, every emotion that she was feeling swirling in her eyes, still making them slightly unreadable, but it made her more mortal, and less like the 'Legendary Commander Shepard'.

"Huh, well, the way things we're going, we're probably going to have to use it soon."

"I think we'll find a lot more giant guns this time."

Well, it's now or never Garrus…

"So, uh… is this the part where we shake hands? I wasn't sure about the protocol on reunions, so I did some research but I'm not sure if you still…"

Her lips brushed across my cheek and mandible, so soft, so unlike my skin;

"I haven't forgotten our time together… and that was the protocol on reunions."

"Uh, glad to know my romantic...erm … skills? Made an impression."

She laughed; she's even more stunning when she's happy.

"I thought about you every day while I was on Earth, and then when we closed in on Menae and we saw Palaven, I was so worried…"

"I was worried when I heard about Earth too… thought I'd lost you again, but then I thought, it's going to take more than Reapers to stop this cross-species liaison."

She laughed again, taking my hands and moving in close.

"I want you to know, I've seen Kadian…"

I couldn't help it, I gave a growl, more menacing than the one I had made while she had become the jiggling spectacle.

"He's at the Citadel right now; he got taken down by the mech EDI has commandeered. We haven't really talked about this yet… but I think he thinks we didn't break up."

I scoffed;

"The way he behaved on Horizon was pretty clear… and that message he sent you was like something a kid whose favourite toy was taken away would do."

"Garrus, there is no chance I'm ever going back there."

I let go of a breath I was holding… I was holding my breath? Before I had a chance to reply she kissed me again, this time, directly on my lips and I leant into her. Spirits she made me feel so good.

"I gotta go, make sure Joker isn't making a mess all over EDI's new body… but, you know where to find me."

I smiled;

"Ahuh and this time…" I bent down and pulled out the bottle I had stored under my table "I can afford the good stuff… one of the perks to being an expert adviser; you get the pay to match."


	2. Normady Triangle

_Time Period: A week after Priority Citadel (Cerberus Attack), Mass Effect 3_

_Current Love Interest: Garrus_

_Point of View: Third Person_

* * *

><p>"-ard! O<em>h come on,<em> Airliza!"

She woke with a start, instantly in a bad mood as her first dreamless sleep in weeks had been interrupted.

"What!"

"Well, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed..."

"Damn it, Joker, just tell me what you want!"

"...ok, note to self, get EDI to wake you up if Kadian and Garrus start tearing apart the Crew Deck again."

She pulled the sheets away, taking large strides towards her cabin door;

"Joker, is everyone cleared out?"

"Everyone but Liara, shes trying to break it up. The CIC is pretty crowed, and I'm worried about Javik shooting Johnson, he wont stop bugging him down in engineering."

Quickly she reached the elevator;

"EDI, I want the surveillance footage of where ever they've been fighting, I need to know exactly what happened."

"I've downloaded it to your Omi-tool, Commander."  
>She stood in the elevator in silence, before signing as she looked down at herself, damn her taste in short night-dresses, the lace came no where near her knees, it was only kept up by thin spaghetti straps, more lace tracing a very plunging line around her chest. The door slid open and her ears were instantly filled by the sounds of flying furniture, and biotic pops.<p>

"Both of you, cut it out!"

Liara was starting to sound desperate... Shepard gave one last vain attempt to cover herself slightly more, before she rounded the corner, walking along the trackway that headed to the Med-bay.

"Stop it! What happens if – _gasp,_Shepard..."

The fighting instantly stopped as all three sets of eyes fell on her, Liara was covered by a soft dressing gown, she must have also been woken. Kaidan was in his standard Alliance downtime uniform, while Garrus had an odd smattering of his armour, half on and half off. Each of them gained flushed faces once they took in her appearance, but she did her best to ignore it, continuing her strides to stand before the upturned table that had once been part of the mess hall, she stood tall, her hands crossed over her chest and she watched both boys take an inward gulp of air, she was in CO mode.

"I can take it from here, Liara. Are you ok?"

"Fine, I'll head to the CIC."

She shook her head;

"Head up to my cabin, Joker is complaining about how many people are there. I'll be up once I finish my chat with the _Gunnery Officer and Major_."

Garrus closed his eyes, she was more than angry, resorting to rank and not names was already the first blow she'd dealt him, and he could tell for Kadian it was exactly the same. With one last worried glance, Liara headed towards the elevator, and Shepard didn't move until she heard the doors shut.

"Shep-"

Kaidan had tried to talk, but was only answered by a hard stare, and he instantly closed his mouth once more... and for the first time Garrus was able to see how in her youth she was a leader of a gang, just the look in her blue eyes was enough to make him want to get down on the floor and beg for forgiveness and do what ever she wanted... and her outfit didn't help much either. Without a word she started to type away on her Omi-tool, bringing her hand to her ear as a playback screen popped up, the sound being fed directly into her implants, making it completely impossible to know what she was watching, but he had a good idea. She gave a loud sigh before clicking it off, and then there was a look in her eyes, one that Garrus had never seen before, but he didn't like it... it wasn't intimidating, it made him weak at the knees and a lump form in his throat, and what ever that look was, it was making Kaidan rock back and forth on his heels.

"I am so disappointed... I expected so much more from both of you."

Disappointment, it was even worse to hear that look worded... he'd never disappointed Shepard before, but she stopped looking at him and turned to Kaidan.

"I did _not_ cheat on you Kaidan, the way you acted on Horizon was pretty damn clear, and some half arsed text message wasn't going to make it all better!"

"...It wasn't half arsed, I meant what I said."

"Do you even know how I felt after Horizon? You broke my damn heart Kaidan! The only thing that made anything I was doing with Cerberus bearable up until then was that I _knew_ you were still out there somewhere and that I was going to find you. You all seem to forget what was two years for you was a _week_ to me! I didn't have the time you had to think about things. Then, when I find you, you're a complete and utter prick! Going on about how you cant trust me and how you don't know who I am anymore just because of a stupid Cerberus logo! You, of all the original team was the _one_person I thought would come with me no matter what, but it ends up that you're the only one that wont even think of helping. Hell, even Anderson gave me a hand!"

She drew a sharp breath, tucking the hair that had slipped from her angry movements back behind her ear;

"And damn Kaidan, you're still having a hard time trusting me! But despite all that, I though, I _hoped_, that you and I could both be better people, and avoid a conversation like this... and that you would _never_say those things to, and about, Garrus... I thought you were a much better man."

"Shep-" He stopped "Air... I'm hurting, and yeah, ok, I messed up. For what its worth, I'm sorry. I'll gather my things and get of at our next stop."

"I didnt say you had to leave Kaidan... no, you know what? You are staying, and that's a god damn order."

Garrus hopped, that maybe, while her attention was square on the other human he might have been able to slip away for a moment, get out of the rest of his armour and be more comfortable;

"You stay right there, Vakarian. I'm not done with you yet."

Nothing got passed a sniper.

"You – You really want me to stay?"

"You're an amazing Soldier, one of the best – they didn't make you a Spectre for nothing. You belong here, unless you'd rather be standing around Hacket all day watching people build something that we don't even know how works."

"No, I, you're right – I'll head back into the Lounge, start cleaning up..."

She smirked;

"Garrus watched me chew you out, you have the right to do the same."

"No, I, uh... would rather not."

"Thank the Spirits..."

Shepard shrugged and patently waited for Kaidan to leave.

"Why are you so insecure?"

"What?"

The question knocked him of guard, he was ready for yelling, making him feel even worse for what he'd done to her.

"Why are you so insecure? I _**love**_you, Garrus Vakarian... I never actually told Kaidan that."

"I love you too... but.."

"You cant help but wonder with all these Humans around why would I be interested in a scared Turian? Because... I've been attracted to you the moment I saw you, and I felt why would a Turian be interested in me, as far as I know, I look nothing like a female Turian."

"Uh, yeah, you dont."

"...if anyone was, Kaidan was the rebound, he was the easy option... familiar territory, and I knew he was interested. But after Horizon, I realized, race, doesn't matter, what matters is someone that trusts you, and you trust in return, someone you can talk and have fun with... someone who thinks he's a better shot."

"Hey..."

She smiled, the anger was ebbing away.

"But please, next time someone tries to pick a fight with you over me, don't retaliate... and let me handle myself."

"Uhh, Commander? Is it safe to let everyone back now? Javik is closing in on Johnson..."

"Yeah, its fine now."

She attempted to hide a yawn.

"We woke you up, didn't we?"

"What do you think? This ship runs on Earth time and its about... 1AM."

"... I could always help you get back to sleep."

She placed her hands on her hips;

"As tempting as that is, I doubt Liara wants to see that, and you need to clean up."


	3. Horizon

Time Period: Horizon Mission, Mass Effect 2

Current Love Interest: Kaidan and Garrus

Point of View: None

* * *

><p>The flashes of light were slightly blinding, and the crashes that followed it sounded too close for comfort, but they had little time to care, more worried about the large Collector Husk like creation that had attacked them not a few moments earlier, twitching slightly as it erupted into a bright blue light, disappearing in the process.<p>

"No! Don't let them get away!"

The battered looking mechanic ran up the hill closing in on the group as they began to place weapons away and deactivate biotics. A tall, lean and well-built woman turned, pulling off her helmet as she did so, her blonde hair was a little sweaty, and sticking to her shoulders.

"What are we supposed to do? That ship is huge. How exactly would we catch it?"

"Half the colony's in there! They took Egan and Sam and... and Lilith! Do something!"

"I didn't want it to end this way, I did everything I could!"

Her two companions joined her at this point, once was another woman, wearing almost nothing but tattoos, her head was shaven and as she crossed her arms over her chest she gave the man a scowl. While on her left a large alien known as a Turian moved in closer;

"More than most, Shepard."

"Shepard… I know that name…" his face twisted slightly; "Yeah, I know you, one of those big Alliance heroes!"

"Commander Airliza Jane Shepard; Captain of the Normandy, First Human Spectre, Savior of the Citadel… You're in the presents of a legend Dalen, and a ghost."

The stormy blue eyes that had once been watching the mechanic quickly turned to the new voice, a tall, well-built and handsome man, with dark eyes and dark hair, and her face instantly changed, her eyes became as clear as a cloudless sky and a smile forced its way onto her face.

"All the people that got took and you got left behind, figures. I'm done with you Alliance types."

The mechanic walked off, but no one really seemed to care, as the new solider came in closer, and was quickly embraced in Commander Shepard's arms.

"Kaidan…"

He pulled away, breaking the embrace.

"I thought you were dead, Shepard. We all did."

"You… You sound angry."

"I thought we had something Shepard. I – I loved you. Thinking that you were dead tore me apart! How could you put me through that? Why did you even try to call? Let me know that you were ok."

"Not my choice! I was on an operating table for two years while Cerberus fixed me."

Kaidan backed away;

"You're with Cerberus now? The reports are true…"

"What do you mean reports?" The Turian spoke up, a definite tone in his lower register, conveying something that translates couldn't decipher. "You knew all along?"

"Alliance intel thought that Cerberus might be behind the missing human colonies. They got a tip this colony might be the next one to get hit. Anderson stonewalled me, but there were rumors that you weren't dead. That you were working for the enemy… and I expected more from you too, Garrus."

"Cerberus and I want the same thing!" The crack in Shepard's voice was unmistakable, "To save our Colonies, and they seem to be the only ones wanting to do a damn thing about it! This doesn't mean I work for, or answer to them!"

"Do you really believe that? Or is that what Cerberus wants you to think? You turned your back on everything we believed in. You betrayed the Alliance. You betrayed me."

For a moment, Garrus was sure that Shepard's eyes were watering, that she might break down and cry.

"Kaidan, you know me. You know I'd only do this for the right reasons… You saw it yourself; the Collectors are targeting human colonies."

"I – I want to believe you Shepard, I do. But what if they're behind it all? What if Cerberus is working with the Collectors and they are just using a threat of a Reaper to manipulate you?"

Garrus took a step forward;

"Damn it Kaidan! You're so focused on Cerberus you can't see the real threat."

"I – I can see you won't listen to reason."

Kaidan scoffed; "You come back after two years being dead and are working with Cerberus, what part of that is reasonable? I _know_ where my loyalties lie, I am an Alliance Soldier, and always will be. I've got to report back to the Citadel, they can decide whether to believe you or not."

"No, don't –…" Shepard shook her head "We both know how that's going to turn out, _Alenko_. They'll blame Cerberus just like you did."

"A leopard can't change its spots, Shepard…"

He didn't even glance behind as he walked away, and it took a moment before Shepard moved again.

"Joker, we're ready for pickup. _I've had enough of this damn colony."_

* * *

><p>She didn't like the shuttle ride back to the Normandy, she was used to silence, in fact, she reveled in it, but the way Commander Shepard sat looking out of the window of the shuttle, her face set in a careful mask, her mouth was in a set line, and her eyes more stormy than she had ever seen them in the short time she had been part of the crew. While Garrus sat on the other side of the Shuttle, fuming in his own little area. She shifted in her seat, part of what the whiney Alliance soldier had said did make sense, it was <em>Cerberus<em>, after all, but he must have been massively big headed to not even consider it, seeing this shit with her own eyes was enough for her to work with Shepard for now.

"If I can interrupt this wonderful silence for a moment, who the hell was that prick?"

Shepard's mouth contorted for a moment.

"Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko. He was part of the Saren team…"

"Huh…"

There was more to it than that, but she didn't really want her brains splattered all over the damn shuttle if she kept talking. For all that she had made herself out to be as a _Super Biotic_ Shepard could still hand it to her no problem.

* * *

><p>The airlock hissed and as soon as the shuttle door whooshed open Shepard was striding out of it, ignoring the looks from the Cerberus crew that worked down in the shuttle bay as she quickly pulled off her armour, swearing out loud as when she pulled her arm plates off she pulled too hard and it made a loud clank sound on the other side of the shuttle bay. She didn't bother to pick it up as she made her way to the elevator, a scowl now firmly planted on her face, the glow of the Cerberus cybernetics that brought her back from death now showing from under her tan skin, closing the doors before Jack or Garrus could join her.<p>

"Commander Shepard."

"_What._"

"The Illusive Man is ready to debrief you in the Comm Room, would you like me to change the elevators stop level?"

"What you _can_ do is tell the Illusive Man to stick his damn debrief up his arse and leave me the hell alone."

"The Illusive Man is insist-"

"Damn it EDI!"

"…. Logging you out Shepard."

The elevator door slid open and with two large strides she was at her door, keying in the entry code, before throwing the last pieces of armour off through the door before her.

"_God damn it!"_

She fell to her knees, the sound of her door sliding shut masking the sound, and the pleasant bubbling that came from her fish tank just overpowered her sobs. As quickly as the sobbing fit came on, it was gone, and she pulled herself up, before something caught her eye. On her desk stood a picture frame, one that she had, a few days before, fished a picture out of the extra-net for, and she felt her blood rush to her ears, with a cry that was mingled with anger and pain she took the picture and threw it at the display case that sat before her desk, making the wall between it and her bed area, giving a small thud, before static crossed over the picture of the smiling Kaidan Alenko, before turning black. She yelled out again, the frame hadn't made so much as even a crack. She balled her fist, it being surrounded by a blue glow of her seldom used biotics, and she punched the glass, causing it to shatter and fall, a few pieces embedding themselves in her skin, and fell to the ground once more, the blood from her hand mingling with tears. She didn't even look up when the door slid open;

"Shepard, I –"

The image was one that he had never been even able to imagine, the great Commander Shepard on the floor, her head on her knees with blood and tears falling down them, loud sobs and whimpers echoing around the room. He might not have even known what the red stuff was, if not for his days with C-Sec. He was at a total loss to see is Commander, mentor and closest friend like this, not to mention that Turian social norms for this situation would unlikely be the same for humans. Even still, his legs moved without any thought and he sat down beside her, placing his arm around her shoulders, still covered in her under armour, making sure that he didn't rip through with his sharp talons… and doing his best to ignore that warm feeling that filled him as she placed her head in his chest, and buried it there.

* * *

><p><em>AN: This one has been in my head a little while, and the little Jack interlude is there because Jack and Shepard become rather close over the period of the games, (at least, _this_ Shepard and Jack do.) So just a little extra stuff about their relationship there too - oh and Shakarian Fluff, because thats always fun! Also I listened to a little bit of Evanescence and the ME3 Soundtrack while I wrote this, was really fitting._


End file.
